Empower The Purple Ribbon

With the month of October gone, I have a few questions for you.  How aware are you of Domestic Violence?  Were you aware that October was Domestic Violence Awareness Month?  How prepared are you to empower a victim of domestic violence?

Domestic violence consistently positions itself as the purple elephant with tri colored hair in the room at dinner parties, the workplace, in the classroom, at family gatherings, and most commonly in the home.  No one seems to want to touch the subject, shy’s away from its discussion, or looks the other way thinking that the situation will erase or that someone else will address the issue.  Leaving yet another extremely important opportunity to save a life, pass us by.  According to the Domestic Violence Resource Center, on average, more than three women and one man are murdered by their intimate partners in the United States every day.    
 This was a life that possibly could have been saved or enjoyed time on this earth a bit longer with their family members and friends, had we been aware and empowered ourselves to speak up. Domestic violence crosses all economic, racial, and gender lines.  There is no stereotype that can or should be given to this epidemic, although our society continues to place them in our view.  Before we can do anything, we must become educated on what domestic violence is and what domestic violence looks like.  Here are some forms of domestic violence:

Physical abuse                                                                     
Emotional abuse
Financial abuse                                  
Sexual abuse
Verbal Abuse

We can work at halting the presence of domestic violence in our communities, by using our voices as an empowerment tool.  My first word of advice is to not use your voice as a tool to demean victims, put them down, or ask them questions about why they are in this situation.  A victim may stay in their situation for many reasons, it is not up for us to judge them, only to offer help.  Victims may feel helpless and an inability to leave due to lack of access to family, finances, or the resources to simply pack themselves and/or their children up and leave.  Lastly, the fear of the repercussions from their partner commonly serves as a standing reason that a victim chooses to remain in the relationship, with the belief that the current situation is the only option.  This is why it is important to offer empowerment to a victim.  Passing on the peace of empowerment has the ability to possibly make all the difference in a victims’ life.  The peace of empowerment can be shared by partaking in some of the suggestions below:

Offering a compliment:  This helps in uplifting self esteem.  The abusive partner has often times put them down verbally or made them feel unattractive due to physical abuse.  

Holding a conversation about something that interests them:  Sometimes no one has taken the chance to talk with them about something they enjoy.

Leaving uplifting quotes (out of sight of the abusive partner):  This also helps with building their self confidence and lets them know that someone cares about them and looks forward to putting a smile on their face.

Share information on a domestic violence center:  Casually share information with them on a place they can go, call, or visit for help. 

Share your story:  If you happen to be a survivor of domestic violence, please share your story of empowerment.  This can be the most powerful way to share with the victim that they are deserving of a better life and can achieve it.

Be open to nonjudgmental conversation:  Showing yourself as a honest and caring friend that they can come to and talk openly, can help and letting them know that they have someone to come to in their time of need, should they be choosing to leave the situation.

Let’s start today by not waiting for next October to come around to bring light to the darkness of domestic violence.  Let’s wear our Purple Ribbon’s with pride and share the message that “Domestic Violence Ends With Me,” as a local place of refuge shares in my community.  If you feel that you are a victim of domestic violence and would like to talk or know of someone that is, please don’t hesitate to pick up the phone and dial 1-800-799-7233.

Peace and Blessings,

Edquina